I was one of those kids who could not wait to grow up and be on my own. I have always imagined myself having my own place and being in control. Being the eldest among siblings, I constantly have to act matured and responsible. It was not very hard to do it, I was it.

Now that I have reached actual adulthood and experiencing the freedom and independence that I have long dreamed of, I feel good…well, most of the time.

There are times when I dream of the time when I was sick as a child and have been coughing the whole night, I would hear my mom in the morning telling everyone to let me sleep in because I did not have much sleep during the night. I would feel so warm and relieved deep inside knowing that I could rest and just get well.

Now, as an adult, no matter how little sleep I had the night before, I have to drag my butt to the shower in the morning to get ready for work because I have deadlines, I have responsibilities, I need to show up. Oh adulting…sometimes I wish I could just pause you for a while.