Author’s note: I had to redo this whole thing because I clicked on something and just like that, my whole post was gone. *insert crying emoji*
I posted a picture of my valentine date with my girlfriends and my cousin-in-law (Hi, Ate Sha!) commented that I looked good…must be the “blessed singleness”. Now, just between you and me, whenever someone compliments me on my looks, my insides do a backflip, screaming, “Oh my gosh, she just said I look good!!!!” but outside, I’m like, “oh, uhm, thanks!”, like it’s not a big deal. Let’s just keep that our secret, shall we?
Now, that comment got me thinking, “I look good because I’m blessed to be single?”, hmmm….
I noticed that during Valentine Day a.k.a Single Awareness Day, a lot of social media posts from single people were explaining why they are happy. That does not make sense to me. For example: #oklangwalangboyfriendbusognaman but I did not see #oklangmayasawabusognaman. Is it always assumed that when you’re single, you’re not happy unless you do something extraordinary like eating a meal that looks good on Instagram?
I really do not get the “single blessedness” label. If it such a blessing, why am I too willing to give it up? Seriously, if the right guy comes knocking at my door tomorrow, heck, even tonight, I assure you that that single watchamacallit would be out the window real soon! I mean, I consider Bradley (my car) a blessing and if you tell me now that I would have to lose it, I won’t talk to you for a week or even more.
I don’t know, I think we are putting too much and too wrong expectations on our relationship status (or lack thereof) label. Whatever good thing that could be seen in me and my life right now, let me tell you, being single has the least to do with it. Single might be one of my adjectives but there are a lot of other words that I am as well. I am a woman, daughter, a sister, an aunt, a friend, a demisexual, a heteroromantic, a career woman, a church officer, a backpacker, a scuba diver, a blogger, a reader, a driver, a Filipino, an islander and the list goes on.
Most of my friends are already married now. There are times when they are happy, sad, in love, mad, blooming, having a bad hair day, excited…just as I am. Sad thing is, sometimes they have to put on a happy front because society expects them to act that life is rosy because they have a family. A friend even said that she does not want to talk about the ugly side of marriage when I’m around because I might get discouraged and not get married.
I guess the point of this post is that there is more to life than the labels that society gives us and we would probably be happier if we don’t cave in.
No need to pretend. No need to defend. Life has its ups and downs, single or not.
So if you want to be happy, be.